friendship.

Friends. Everyone has a different meaning for the word. Friends are supposed to be the people you can tell everything to. Friends are supposed to fight...and then make-up. Friends are supposed to be there for you & comfort you when you need if. You're supposed to do the same for your friends. Friends are supposed to know what you're thinking, even when you're not telling them. Friends are supposed to be fun, at least to you. Friends are supposed to be supportive of your decisions. Friends are supposed to call you on your crap. Right? I mean...for all the years I've been living...I've always thought those things would define a true friendship. But I'm starting to wonder what a real friendship is...what a real friendship feels like, I miss the feeling.

No doubt about it I have plenty of friends...people that make me laugh & what not. But I miss that feeling of a true bond, something you don't have to force. Something you don't second guess. I miss the feeling of being able to turn my head and KNOW that there will be people backing me up. I miss that feeling of friends that have been friends for such a long time, but the friendship isn't died out. I miss that honest, true friendship. But I guess that's okay, because it takes time to come across a friendship like that, and it catches you by surprise. These days, since we're living in such a materialistic world filled with fakes & people who are constantly lying to themselves, we become friends with the people who look the most like us. Or act the more like us...from what we know, anyway.

Pardon me for using this cliche, (I hate cliches!) but I miss kinder garden. I miss when our parents dressed us so we didn't get generalized into 'prep' or 'jock' or 'nerd' or 'gangster'...because in reality the only things we wore were GAP & Old Navy, right? (: I miss meeting someone, and clicking because of your interests rather than your appearances. In kinder garden...if you liked to read...you'd go to the rug most likely & read a book. Then you'd find the kids around you who liked doing the same things & that's what would spark a friendship. Same with the people who went to the fake kitchen to play house...and the people who chose to draw...and the people who played with toy cars. It was all just so easy back then to find your friends. Now...you'd never see completely different girls hanging out together. I mean, you might...but you know what happens when you see all these girls who come from different back rounds & interests? They CHANGE! Oh my god! This change thing, still drives me crazy. But it happens...the group of different girls all morph into one another & start dressing differently to impress one another, start listening to the same music as the other girls would just to fit in. And then the friendship becomes fake. Does that make any sense? Do you follow what I'm saying?

Blah, I just am in desperate need for something fresh & real.

P.S: THE WEATHER HERE SUCKS. IT'S MAKING ME CRANKY. AND MY JOB IS MAKING ME CRANKY. I NEED TO GET OUT OF THIS STUPID TOWN! GROSHJTAEJH >.< I HATE HUMIDITY & MOSQUITOS. Just needed to get that out of my system. (; Thanks for your time. <3